About the Mothership

Maria Bailey is a nationally known author, talk show host and mother of three teenagers. In just a few short years, she'll be the mom of four teenagers as her tween turns the corner on 13. In order to keep her sanity, she took up marathon running when she had 3 babies under 20 months. It was about the same time that she laughed at a mother who told her that having three teenagers would be much more difficult than having three toddlers. She was right! Whoever she was, she was right.

Maria works full time outside the home as the CEO of BSM Media, a full service marketing and media company with clients such as Disney, Avon, Precious Moments and many other global brands. Her work takes her around the world, however, she always takes a child along when schedules allow. Her teenagers started the Share-A-Shoe Foundation as a result of a trip to South Africa. To date they have collected over 100 pairs of cleats for children in South Africa shack villages.

Maria is the author of four books on marketing to moms including "Trillion Dollar Moms" and "Mom 3.O". Her newest book, "The Ultimate Mom Book" will be released by HCI Publishers, creator of the Chicken Soup for the Soul series, on Mother's Day 2009. She is host of Mom Talk Radio, www.momtalkradio and co-host of Good Day with Doug Stephan, the #7 morning radio talk show, www.dougstephan.com. Maria is also founder of Newbaby.com (http://www.newbaby.com/) and you can follow her on twitter at MomTalkRadio.






Hi! I’m Lynn Armitage, and I am lost in space – a stratosphere of life called The Teen Years. It is unfortunate that our children don’t come with Owner’s Manuals, (though I tried desperately to look for one the day I brought my newborn home), but boy, could I use one now! I have a 15-year-old daughter who drives me nuts most of the time, and she claims that I do the same for her. At least we have THAT in common.

Then there are those really great moments between us, when I want to hug my little-big girl tight enough to stop time (that thief!) dead in his tracks; moments that play out like that scene from “Titanic,” when Kate Winslet is floating all alone in the icy water, crying out in a barely audible voice to the distant lifeboat, “Come back! Come back!” Only I’m screaming silently to my daughter, “Don’t leave! Don’t leave!”

On bad days, we fight over the smallest of things – too much eyeliner, revealing shirts with age-inappropriate necklines, the rap-crap music she listens to (what happened to songs that tell a good story, like everything The Eagles ever did?), her piles of dirty laundry, the constant eye-rolling, her pleas for unlimited text messaging (500 a month just isn’t enough!), IMing friends when she’s supposed to be doing homework (she thinks I’m not watching!) and the damn iPod stuck in her ear that offers the perfect excuse for why she can’t hear me yelling at her.

On good days, it’s so easy, just me and her. We laugh. We watch “House” together. We share a cup of Chamomile tea. It's just so easy.

I am also the single mother of an 11-year-old (another girl!), a teenager-in-training. I am a radio news producer and gourmet cupcake-shop owner; the former editor of two celebrated regional parenting magazines, as well as Body Beautiful Magazine; an award-winning, syndicated columnist; a columnist for Indian Country Today; a featured blogger for Family Events, with Marybeth Hicks; a guest travel writer for TravelingMom.com; founder of the blogs Old, My Ass! and A Mad Mom, where decorum and niceties get checked in at the door; and lately, a professional daydreamer, wondering what all the mothers WITHOUT teenagers are doing today.

I am thrilled to be collaborating on “My Teen, The Alien” with Maria Bailey, who, as you can read from her bio, is one of the busiest mothers on this planet.